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Being afraid of women, being shy, not having funny things to say to women are common ailments. But they are not brick walls that separate the men from the boys. Building up your confidence, in any situation, will naturally flow into all aspects of your life. Once you find things to say to women, you'll find ways to say them. You'll be able to create an atmosphere of comfort friendliness with everyone that surrounds you. This is also a one day at a time exercise.
You cannot learn to be confident in one day. But you can learn how to handle situations differently, with confidence and humor, that will flow into meeting new friends, being better dressed and confident. |
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It has everything to do with it.
If emotions are so powerful and addictive, you can imagine the power of the emotion called SEX, which is such a primal instinctive thing. Unfortunately though, most people let the emotion of sex control them, instead of learning to harness this emotion in productive ways. For some people, the emotion of sex can make them depressed, as they associate it with past painful emotional experiences. For others, they associate it with power and thus feel the need to “conquer” another woman every day. For others, they associate it with being “bad”. For some, they associate it with escape. Others associate it with self-esteem. You can see the problems this might lead to and the behavior patterns that might result. |
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See, you're a guy. Women don't think this way. And of course, since women feel and think differently, it's a HORRIBLE idea to use your logic with women.
Women actually are REPULSED by the behaviors described above. That's not to say women want to be mistreated - they don't - but they have ZERO attraction to *nice* guys. I use *nice* in quotes because *nice* in this sense means SUBMISSIVE. A woman will NOT be grateful AT ALL for those submissive behaviors. She'll actually treat you like dirt if you display those behaviors. Why, why, why, you ask? Well, women think that *nice* guys are DESPERATE guys. They think *NICE* behavior is DESPERATE, weak, butt-kissing behavior. This is especially true during the initial stages when a guy meets a woman. Later on, you can show occasional acts of *niceness* because you've proven you are NOT desperate. |
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home up
First of all, let's go over the positive things you relate in your story, because there are a lot of subtle attitudinal things going on here that I don't want anyone to miss:
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